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after being reunited with one sodak friend, dancing to madonna 58 times, engaging in a slightly awkward makeout session with a gay man on the dance floor, consuming a ridiculous amount of fried food and encountering but one straight man the entire weekend, i am now in full recovery mode from the weekend those of us "in the know" look forward to all year long– gay pride. otherwise known as "new years."
free your mind– not only the theme of this year's celebration, but also a message of hope. while to outsiders, this weekend may seem like just one more excuse to engage in drunken debauchery, for this proud ally, it's also an incredibly important celebration of equality and justice for all. the ability to be free no matter what your race, religion or sexual orientation. perhaps sometime in our lifetime, we won't even need a specific weekend to celebrate this– it will just be the way it is.
we can only hope.
recently, i've had the opportunity to befriend a man i would have otherwise never crossed paths with. because we have a mutual friend, a few weeks ago, our paths met.
at first glance, i mentally rolled my eyes and braced myself for a long day spent on the boat with what seemed like a total frat boy. as he walked up the driveway with his other frat boy-looking friend, carrying a bottle of karkov vodka with a cocky grin on his face, i considered making a run for it, but i knew that would seem a bit dramatic.
as soon as we were on the boat, i situated myself with chelsea's book, happy i would probably be able to read it all, as i knew i wouldn't be partaking in conversations about beer bongs or the merits of bart simpson.
and then something odd happened.
beer bongs and bart simpson never came up. five minutes into our day on the boat, i put my book down and joined in on the fun. i wiped the sour look off my face and decided to get to know this guy a little better. and i didn't find a frat boy in him; i found a new friend.
sure, he might not be into discussing religion or engaging in a heated political debate, he might drink a little too much karkov vodka for my tastes, and (gasp!) he might not be nearly as liberal as i'd like him to be.
but you know what? two weeks into our newfound friendship i've realized that he is quite possibly one of the sweetest, most caring men i've met, flaws and all. we've spent an ample amount of time together, as i've recently begun dating one of his friends, and i always leave with a genuine smile on my face after time spent with him.
turns out that silly little cliche "never judge a book by its cover," really does ring true.
oh, and chelsea's book? it's made a home by my nightstand, about halfway read.
i guess that's just summer for you.
sunday evening, i traded in the stoop for my friend matt's rooftop. matt recently moved into a beautiful loft nestled right into the heart of downtown minneapolis, and i was in awe of our view as we sipped wine and caught up on life after his birthday soiree the night before.
matt just turned 40 and recently broke up with his girlfriend; i am about to be 26 and have just embarked on yet another new dating adventure. completely different life perspectives at completely different times; yet, somehow, they mesh. at the end of the day, we were just two city kids sipping wine and talking life on the rooftop with skyscrapers as our background.
a lovely way to end a perfect summer weekend.
it seems as though summer is upon us. the temperature hasn't dipped below 50 degrees in several weeks, i haven't gone to bed at a decent time on a friday or saturday night since late april, my closet is bursting with color with all of my flirty summer dresses, and i myself am bursting with flirtatious energy.
the long, cold, man-less winter (with but a few sporadic dates) has given way to the heat of summer– there are sparks everywhere. a summer romance may just be possible for this winter shut-in after all.
benjamin and i met on friday night for a group outing with our mutual friends. we had a lovely night, and after a couple cocktails, a few games of pool and one incredibly cheesy scary movie, i knew i was into him.
sweet, smart, gorgeous and polite– a true gentleman. we didn't even exchange numbers or kiss good night– just a simple hug with a promise of seeing each other soon. a few email exchanges at the start of this week proves that "soon" may in fact be "this weekend."
whether this new friendship blossoms into a romance, or whether it just stays where it's at, i have no idea– but i'm loving the innocence of it all.
old-fashioned chivalry and romance– makes me feel like a girl of 16 again.
last night's restaurant club met at my choice, 112 eatery, a quaint little restaurant settled into an old building in the warehouse district downtown minneapolis.
we took the elevator up to the second level and situated ourselves at a table by a big window looking down on the streets of my favorite little city. we immediately poured over the wine list and selected a delightful pinor noir to accompany our meals.
since i've heard amazing reviews of the eatery's pride and joy– the cheeseburger– i ordered that. the gooey cheeseburger lived up to its rave reviews, as i devoured every single bite! served on an english muffin, it was just the right size to fill me up, and definitely not as greasy as the english muffin cheeseburger i tried at nick & eddie's a few months ago.
for dessert, lisa and i split the chocolate pot de creme– basically a fancy way of saying "chocolate pudding." while we could only manage a few bites each of the incredibly rich dessert, it was well worth it (and it was delicious with the pinot noir.)
all in all, this charming little restaurant provided a wonderful atmosphere for wine and conversation, and it served up a flavorful and unique meal. i'll definitely be back to try out some of their appetizers very soon!
today, i am proud to admit something that i never thought my 25-year-old self would be saying–
i totally have a crush.
crushes in the mid-twenties are rare, as most single men i meet have either been pre-arranged for me to date, or they're gay. (and, speaking from past experience, i have given up all hope of romance with the latter.)
but there is a loophole in this crazy maze of post-college dating that allows you to meet single straight men without precondition: the recreational sports team.
for the past three years, despite having no athletic ability whatsoever, i have been on a co-ed softball team. mostly because my friend is the "team leader" and has somehow convinced me every year to come back. partly because the idea of drinking beer on a monday night without judgment is incredibly appealing. and partly because my permanent status in right field leaves little opportunity for me to make a complete fool of myself. (although i have managed this on a surprising number of occasions.)
however, this year, sparks are flying on the field, bringing my motivation to a whole new level.
he's been on my team for the past two years, but one of us has always been in a relationship. this year, thanks to some sneaky detective work on my part, i found out we are both single and free to mingle. problem is– we're both also incredibly shy when it comes to talking to the opposite sex. so we've exchanged a total of four sentences since the season started a month and a half ago.
the way i see it– it's four sentences. and we've still got two months to go.
but really– who's counting?
yesterday, as i was crossing the 10th avenue bridge in the pouring rain on my way home from work, i listened to my friend tell me how the previous night's dream of an ex had left him completely derailed the whole day.
"why?" he asked me. "i was doing so well."
it's a feeling i know all too well.... a feeling that anyone who's dealt with the pain of a breakup knows all too well, has dealt with all too often.
you're moving along, moving ahead, and then all of a sudden, out of nowhere....
you're sitting outside at a cafe, slipping a glass of red wine, and someone passes by, leaving the faint scent of his cologne. all of a sudden, happy hour has turned melancholy. you discover a water bottle in your refrigerator, hiding behind all the leftovers you should've cleared out months ago, that was his. getting ready for a fun friday night out turns into crying yourself to sleep at 9pm.
as time passes by, these moments are fewer and further in between, and the pain lessens.... but does it ever really go away?
as i was crossing that bridge, i listened to my friend and offered my thoughts in the most compassionate way i knew how. while i wished he didn't have to go through this, deep down, i was grateful i only had to deal with the rain on the outside.
but later, as i was settled into my couch and under a blanket, watching a scary movie and listening to the rain pour down outside, i felt it. that familiar pang. the pang that translates from man to woman, from new york to minneapolis, from generation to generation.
the pang that made me wish that, just for a moment, he was there. holding my hand, listening to the rain, putting his arm around me when i jumped at a scary scene, laughing at how easily i spooked.
it's the pang that reminds me that while sometimes someone may no longer be a physical part of my life, they'll always be in my heart.... no matter how much i fight it.
and, as far as i've come, as many bridges as i've crossed– i have yet to learn how to make that pang go away forever.
after standing in line for three hours in the dreary minnesota weather, phil and i finally made it inside the xcel energy center to our destination: obama's victory speech. we were well aware history was about to be made, and we were like giddy schoolchildren as we made our way to our seats, thrilled to be a part of the experience.
and what an experience it was. obama declared victory at the podium in st. paul, securing his place in history as the first african-american presidential nominee. as i intently listened to obama speak, i knew he was right. this WAS our moment. i could feel it all around me– a new generation was about to step up and take charge and i was going to be part of it. i am part of it.
the road to november 4th is surely going to be a long and draining one, but i am incredibly excited to see where it takes us....
after a fabulous friday night that included a surprise appearance by my long-distance friend, a dozen red balloons, too many cosmopolitans to count, an amazing movie and a night capped off by lots of dancing (and a few slices of pizza), i headed two hours north with my family for a wedding on saturday.
as i sat in the pews waiting for the bride to make her much anticipated appearance down the aisle, i realized that this was the first wedding i'd been to in my entire adult life where i felt completely happy for the happy couple.
i wasn't enviously looking at the bride as she smiled through her happy tears at the groom. i wasn't wishing to be up there in a white dress, or even to have a man by my side. i had my mom, dad and sister on either side of me; i felt nothing but grateful and blessed.
later that night, as my sister and i giggled and danced to slow song after slow song amongst all the happy couples, i realized what a happy single i've become. shockingly, i didn't even look twice at any of the men attending the wedding. (however, i did become fast friends with the gay man from L.A. who chatted about celebs and nightclubs with me in between all the dancing.)
i mean, really. who needs a man when you've got a fabulous silk dress, a room full of friends and family, and a dad paying for all the drinks?
